Tuesday, 1 October 2013

Post Fertility Books?

Just a quick post to ask a question.

Aside from Pamela's book Silent Sorority and Miriam Zolls book, does anyone know of any other childless/free books about recovering from failed fertility treatments and learning to live childfree??

I saw the fertility therapist today and she was amazed at what I told her about our blogging community.  She has several couples trying to deal with the same issues with no support structure and no community to which to turn.  She is going to recommend blogging to them!

I told her that I had started a list of books that I wanted to read and would send it to her, only to look at my list and see a total of two!

Surely there are more out there?????? 




  1. hi Annie,
    I am not sure, but I think that Miriam adopted a child.

    Additional book that I also liked:
    Lisa's I'm Taking My Eggs and Going Home: How One Woman Dared to Say No to Motherhood
    (doesn't have a book a cool title?)

    I hope that there is some other book out there.... I would love to read it.

  2. That's right! I knew there was another one out there I had seen. Thanks Klara!
    The therapist had other books that she loaned out to other women. I will get a list of them from her.

  3. I also don't know others except Lisa Manterfield's book.

  4. I just hit publish on a response & I don't know where it went to??

    I wanted to say -- there are more out there (although I would say Lisa & Pamela's are right at the top of the list!). Unfortunately, some of them are 20-30 years old & out of print or hard to find. I would suggest you go to Amazon & search for "childless" "childfree" & then combine those terms with "infertility" & you should find quite a few. Also, there are many other books out there aimed at the childfree by choice crowd -- don't discount those, they often have some good stuff in them that makes you think.

    A couple, off the top of my head:

    * Sweet Grapes by Jean & Michael Carter -- this is considered a classic in the field. Caveat: it was written in the early 1980s, when there were not as many fertility treatment options out there as there are today to muddy the waters. It also includes adoption as a choice for moving beyond treatment. I found their whole idea of "choice" -- that if you make a conscious choice to be childfree, all will be well -- a bit annoying. I found myself muttering, "some choice...!" And yet there's truth in what they say -- that it may be better to make a firm decision than to drift endlessly. Some good basic advice.

    * Never to be a Mother by Linda Hunt Anton

    * I Don't Need a Baby to Be Who I Am by Joan Brady

    * Life Touches Life by Lorraine Ash -- more of a stillbirth memoir, but she & her husband decided not to try again.

    * Beyond Childlessness by Rachel Black. This has some good stuff in it but I haven't finished it. I find myself getting annoyed because she includes secondary infertility in her definition of "childlessness." I don't discount the pain of secondary infertility -- but not being able to have ANOTHER child is NOT childlessness!! :p

    Jody Day of Gateway Women has a new book out, I haven't read it yet, but am looking forward to it. :) It's called "Rocking the Life Unexpected."

    I wanted to add that Miriam's book is not about living childfree specifically... she did wind up adopting. But it is a great book that recognizes the toll that infertility treatment can take.

    Also, if you go to my blog, I have some links in the sidebar on the right-hand side to sites & message boards, etc. -- Although some of the links are out of date... time for a blog cleanup soon, methinks...! I've also been thinking I should add a reading list tab, & this response will provide with me a good basis for that...! ; )

    Hope this helps...

    1. Wow, Loribeth. This is amazing!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for taking the time to share all this information!

  5. Unsung Lullabies: Understanding and Coping with Infertility by Janet Jaffe, David Diamond and Martha Diamond